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What it do, beautiful people? Sorry to leave you in silence yesterday, I had a lot going on. One of the most phenomenal days I've had a quite a while, I must admit! As we speak, I'm packing to get up and get out of New York for a few days. As much as I love this place, I could use a break! I'm dipping out tomorrow afternoon and I hope to have some utter foolishness colorful anecdotes to report when I return.

So, guess who has a new stalker? Yup! This is number three in a 12-month-period. I don't know what it is about me, guys. Brothers seem to be either completely ambivalent or recklessly relentless when it comes to your Sister, and I don't dig it not one bit. I guess it's my own fault for giving my number to a "bisexual" fella in a gay club, but in my defense I was plenty drunk and high off the attention I was getting from the kids.

Now, not five minutes after getting my number, this gentleman decides to dance with my male friend....and pull his pants and underwear in the process, showing my friend and I his NAKED ASS IN THE CLUB. This cat has called me THIRTEEN times in a two-day period, including the ungodly hours of 1AM and 6AM. On two of these occasions, I have allowed Sir Fabulous to answer my phone and tell him I wasn't there. He actually copped a little 'tude the second time and said "Listen, sweetness, put Toldja on the phone now!" or some shit. WHY?????

Now, I've hit a brother up a few times before accepting the fact that he failed to see how freaking fabulous I am. However, I am referring to making a few phone calls on different days over the course of a few weeks. THIRTEEN CALLS IN TWO DAYS is a whole 'nother story. What did he think was gonna happen? HE SHOWED HIS ASS IN THE CLUB! LITERALLY! YES I KNOW I AM "YELLING", BUT HE SHOWED HIS ASS IN THE CLUB! ASS! NAKED ASS!

This really, really cannot be life. You see why I need to get the hell out of New York for a moment? I have literally spent the past three days alternately lusting for and running from gay men. This is a bit much, even for me. Even for me.

I'm not looking forward to when little Thelonious Malik and Miles David* ask me what Mommy was like when she was younger. At this rate, I'll probably just tell them to get a $20 from Daddy's purse and go get some candy. You read that correctly.


No Five For Friday this week, loves. But I do have something else to share before I jet. Please check out the following videos. I'm pretty sure you will be ready to exile yourself after the second one.

1) Gil Scott Heron and Brian Jackson- "We Almost Lost Detroit"


2) T Baby- "It's So Cold In The D"


It's pretty safe to say that we have, in fact, lost Detroit. This is seriously the saddest thing I have see in my entire life and I am going to hell, because I can't stop watching it and LITERALLY weeping.

This can't be life, it can't, it can't, it can't!
Sister Toldja


*-Those are beautiful names, I'm not budging and whomever marries me will like them.