Wait, What Was I Talking About?*

via The Beautiful Struggler - Me, Myself and Eye

Hey, ho! Beasley Bees, let's go!

Don't ask my why my elementary school's cheer is in my head, or how I even still know it. I'm pretty sure I only attended one basketball game in my eight years there. I remember it like it was yesterday. Well, not really, cause I don't recall what grade I was in. Anyway, they cancelled gym for an afternoon game and my class got to watch. Our boys played an all-white team from some school we assumed was in the suburbs, which was probably NOT the case. We made loads of jokes about them coming to the projects to play us. And they completely kicked our asses. Magnet school kids can't jump either, I suppose.

Question- is there anyway I can make my hair grow? I know the answer is probably "no", as I am sure folks would save a lot of money on lace fronts and quick weaves if there were a solution. But I was just wondering. Cause some days my hair looks like this:

BUT other days, it's more like this:

My soul doth glow.

NOTE- So, I have NO clue what the rest of this entry was SUPPOSED to be about. Why? Because I stopped here about three hours ago. Why? BECAUSE THERE IS A MOUSE IN MY FREAKING BEDROOM AND IT IS GOING TO KILL ME! AAAAAHHHHHHHHHHHH! WHYYYYYYYYY??? NOOOOOO!!!!!!!

I swear, whenever I feel like everything in my life is completely screwed, the universe adds a damn mouse to the fold. A rodent cherry atop the sundae of tragedy that is my life. And of course, what is the first thing that always comes to mind when I have a mouse? "If only I had a man in my life..." That's also my first thought when I can't put a piece of furniture together, when I don't have anything to do on a Friday night, when it's cold outside, when I make dinner, when I have to carry heavy bags from the store, when it rains and when the day ends with the letter "y". But it is particularly poignant at times like this, when the mere presence of a man could give me such great comfort! The mouse can't kill me in my sleep if there's a MAN in my bed! Or better yet, if I went to sleep at HIS house.

I'm really tired of being alone.

So here I am, two in the morning, sitting in the living room fully dressed with a broom by my side. I'll have a kitten within the next two weeks, but that doesn't help me now. I'm so tired, but I can't sleep because the mouse will undoubtedly kill me. The only thing that could put me to sleep is in the bedroom and I can't go in there. That's his room now.

Get your mind out the gutter, btw.

If the mouse kills me tonight and you never hear from me again, just know that I love you. Otherwise, why would I entertain you for free for two years with nothing in return? I mean, y'all COULD put something in my tip cup. Or at least try to hook me up with your single cousin or homeboy or father or SOMEBODY. Shoot, maybe I wouldn't be forced to die at the hands of the mouse had you done that. But you didn't think about that, did you? Nope. You just thought about using me to get your next laugh, like I was just an old Archie Double Digest or something. Like I don't have feelings or needs.

You never miss the water 'till it's gone, dammit!
Sister Toldja

*-If you've ever had a real conversation with me, you'd know I am good for losing my train of thought very quickly and saying that.

PS-Y'all know I'm a longtime New Edition and, ahem, New Kids On The Block fan. So I had such higher hopes for this song. I kinda like this one, even though it sounds like "Boyfriend/Girlfriend" 2008.

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