Five For Friday

via The Beautiful Struggler - Me, Myself and Eye

The week is ending, despite my fears that it would go on forever and ever. Thank goodness for getting by with a little help from my friends.

Never would have made it!

Five for Friday this week: a mini-review of the foolishness of the web and world this week.

1) DTWS WTF:

Creepy on many a level.

So 17-year-old Olympian Shawn Johnson was being stalked by a man who was *luckily* apprehended outside the Dancing With The Stars studio. And all I could think was...SHE'S SEVENTEEN? Why is she even on that show? Those costumes are very sexy and, well, my 17-year-old wouldn't be sharing the stage with Lil' "Stiff dicks feel sweet in this little petite" Kim. God damn America, stop pimping out your young daughters! Brittney Spears, Lindsay Lohan, Miley Cirus, those two really fancy clothes hangers who used to be on Full House back when they had body fat, Beyonce, Rihanna...all these chicks showed they ass on some Lolita stuff before they were old enough to drink and it's redic. I'll never forget seeing the Olson twins hosting SNL and how the crowd went bananas when they announced they'd be "legal" in a week. Ugh. This country eats it's young. That does not excuse the stalker at ALL, but I would't have know who she was had that not happened. Don't want anyone to think I am blaming the victim.

2) If You Are Surprised, You Are A Bigger Fool Than Puffy

Poor little rich girls.

The interwebs gave a collective "Oh no, he didn't!" this week when an advertisement for Ciroc promo models hit the blogosphere. The promo gig, which was likely at a club or bar called for women who were "White, hispanic or light skinned african american" (sic). People of course assumed that this little $35 an hour event was being casted by Puff Daddy himself, which is redic, and he of course denounced the offensiveness of the ad. Ciroc released a statement explaining that this wasn't an official event and they had nothing to do with it.

Well, that is fine and dandy, but it doesn't matter. For one, we know this isn't the only time a liquor promotion, photo shoot or music video hasn't called for light skinned and non-Black models only. Shit, LL Cool J's "Going Back To Cali" doesn't feature a SINGLE black woman of any complexion. I've been out and seen groups of liquor models repping one brand who could all pass the paper bag test. Was it a coincidence? Who knows. But I also know that Puff Daddy has made his fetish for light, bright and sometimes White women no secret. He'd probably drop kick Kim Porter off the Empire State Building for another chance at Jennifer Lopez. So if it had been decided that the image of the Ciroc woman was to be of a certain kind, I wouldn't be shocked.

3) The Twitterous Life
Speaking of Puff Daddy, and you know that I have a long-standing hatred of him, I noticed that the favorite artists of mine who I follow on Twitter are apparently friends of Diddy. Like, actual friends. This is why I should have never signed up for that nerd shit in the first place! I refuse to follow @iamdiddy, but I have noticed that he's pretty funny and friendly on the site. But I still hate his guts! Apparently, he asked people to twitt Talib Kweli and demand a new Black Star album, to which Kweli responded that Puff talks to Mos more than he does.

Twitter: destroying my image of people one updated at a time.

Oh, and how about my mother joined and requested to follow me? ACCESS DENIED. And why is she only following CNN, a "wine guy", some random White Brooklyn party promoter and...wait for it....Levar Burton?

Mom: It was between him and Shaq and I was wondering what Levar was up to.

iCan't and iShan't.

4) Absolutely Not Surprising

What about him is not scary?

It surprises me when it surprises other people when there are instances of police racism in the South. No offense to my down bottom friends, but the idea of "White Southern police officer" is enough to make me break out in a sweat. I know the NYPD conjures the same fear for a lot of people, but truth be told, most of the male officers I see of all races smile at me. There is some other unconscionable levels to that at times, but that's another conversation.

Police Chief David Kunkle said Thursday that Officer Robert Powell will be placed on leave with pay pending an internal investigation over the March 18 incident with Houston Texans running back Ryan Moats.

The officer had pulled over Moats as he and relatives were hurrying to see his dying mother-in-law. Powell drew his gun, threatened the NFL player and held him in the parking lot, officials said. By the time Moats got inside, the woman had died.

Kunkle said the department is "embarrassed and disappointed."

Click here to watch the ish go down.

As horrifying as this story is, it just doesn't shock me. I'm actually relieved he didn't shoot the brother's wife when she walked away from his bitch ass.

5) Jacking For Clips

Freshalina posted this first, but I would be remiss if I didn't share. Help, help us all:

Quietly, this is not bad in a 90's R&B kind of way, BUT he has a ponytail. Men with ponytails transcend any rules about judging people based on appearance or being sensitive to folks feelings. Like, you couldn't play yourself harder if you had a Gamecube for a brain. Ponytails, Jheri curls, man braids: the self-hate trifecta.

I'd discuss his cowrie shell chocker, but I have to go.

Also, TODAY IS ORAN "JUICE" JONES' BIRTHDAY! Why do I know that? Because he is my Facebook friend. What would I do without freaking Facebook? Anyway, since Universal Music is on some supreme hater player shit, here are some college kids reenacting Jones' legendary 1986 video for "The Rain":

LMFAO @ the part with the cases of beer!

Have a gooood weekend!
Sister Toldja

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